Herd of Angels
Cast: 2 men
Set: Can be just about
any place for casual conversation or can be set as a Sonic Drive-in commercial
spoof with both sitting as in a car at the drive in. The drive-in set permits cast member to
conceal script notes on a makeshift dashboard.
For the drive-in spoof version, use these two additional
lines:
Man 1 [Reaching into
Man 2’s Sonic bag]: These buy one get
one wings are really great! Especially
the free part.
Man 2 Everything seems to be
free for you every day.
You know how you told me that Christmas was not all about
presents?
Yes
Understanding Christmas being all about presents was easier
than what you church people are selling.
What?
Take that herd of Angels.
What herd of Angels?
Angels, we have a herd on high. And they are singing sweetly over the plains
as well. A singing herd of angels, yeah
right.
That’s not exactly…
Oh if that was all, then I would have thought nothing of it,
but you guys promote lying.
We surely do not!
That little town of Bethlehem. How still we see you lie! It is 2016 and they are still singing about
their lying.
You don’t understand
the grammar and syntax of the verse.
Sin Tax! I knew
it. They are just after your money. But putting a tariff on transgressions, that
takes the cake.
Can we get back to
Christmas?
I don’t know why.
Emanuel and Gloria seem to have monopolized the whole business. I don’t know who Gloria is, but if she
doesn’t’ answer after the first 3 or 4 times you sing out her name, she is not
going out with you so just give it up and try another girl.
It’s about God with
us and giving glory to God.
That’s not what the song says. It’s got something to do with a day old excel
spreadsheet. It was Greek to me.
Actually
it was Latin and it means Glory to God in
the highest! In Excelsis Deo.
Yeah, that’s it. That day old excel spreadsheet stuff.
Let
me try to explain.
I would rather that you didn’t.
Why?
Because I don’t want to listen to
you explain why virgins are round.
Pregnant women, yeah, but…
What!
Round yon virgin, mother and child…
How
about we go to church together this
Sunday and I will explain things as we go.
Would you give it another try?
Sure.
Really?
You betcha. Not because I think I will understand it any
better, but there is a girl that I’ve got to meet.
Who?
Mary Didjano. The way everyone was singing about Mary did ja
know, I’ve got to meet her.
I’ve
got my work cut out for me here.
You have no idea. I haven’t even gotten to the part where they
don’t’ even find out the name of the kid before they write the song.
I
have no idea what you are talking about.
Neither did anyone else. They just kept singing What child is this? It was
like a song about the first day of school.
OK. I give up.
Christmas is about presents. You
win.
Really?
Sort
of. Christmas is about a really big
present that God gave us when he came into the world as a baby named
Jesus. Hang with me next Sunday and I
will make sure you understand everything.
Yeah OK, as long as you introduce me to
Mary Didjano.
We
have to get there early though.
Why?
We
don’t’ want that herd of Angels to get all the good parking spots do we?
Exit.
The end.
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